Battles

I am sad, and it isn’t the type of sadness to go away when things get better. This sadness strikes at any moment, at any given time. When I am riding high with family and friends, I feel as if something latches onto me, and drags me to my knees. Holding me down, and making me suffer. I become jailed by this sadness, and am occasionally freed. Temporarily filled with joy and happiness, only to grow anxious, as i know it will make its return. Like an earthquake, if it does not strike often, it will hit with full force. A weeks of happiness becomes a night filled with intrusive, and horrible thoughts. I become incapacitated, and know that if I give leverage to these thoughts, I will lose. I win when I do not fall victim to myself. When I hold out till dusk, and all the demons slip away into shadows. This battle is constant, and i fear one day i may lose, but that day is not today.

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